Alms & Prayer of Translation of Qu'est ce que c'est que

Need to shorthand this

Yesterday, met a black lady during my smoking prayer as I dare Death. She asked for directions via bus. Had no idea. We talked. I got her a Lyft luxury. In that talk, we shared our experiences of sexual abuse. She had relations with women. Then tried two guys. Both abused her. I advised that she always treat any guy who watches pornography as a red flag. I'm praying for her not to be homeless forever. It has been a month. The harms that people do to others... This is the Passion of Christ that we must ourselves carry on this Earth

Before that, I was meditating hard on Saint Padre Pio. Got a solution to the hardest Article Zero problem in the book. It's the post-intro case. I have a strong conjecture that cannot be proven until I'm done logging and examining over 100,000 words. I have examined at least 1,800 unique words. No idea how many that would add to. Anyway, thank the Heavens. That conjecture developed a bit too easy for a problem that took me 8 years to figure out. Very promising

I have long made a construction of my system under this axiomatic system. Looks like for what I'm translating now: [Qu'est-ce que c'est que] is going to transcend anything I have before or since, and a lot of my methods are genuinely radical. I'm getting a Heavenly insight on how to do something that would hitherto been impossible for me. It's all these years of building up everything I have ever known into my arsenal. This is the HARDEST thing to translate while honoring my system that cannot be violated

Husband and I talked. I have no idea why I'm so blessed. In studying the life of Saint Padre Pio, more of why now makes sense to me. I can't deal with past traumas of the denial of my work. I can deal with everything else but not that. He told me that he never got it and that balancing the real world, hard logic, and mystical experiences has been hard for him, even if he embraces those. In the end, I left college with one paper to be done. No one understood it. People pleaded. Professors did. He has pleaded with me over the years. Nothing stopped me. 

And why? A tremendous faith in God and in the angels. I was called to do this. I guess on some level the Heavens was fine with that... In an era where so much consumerism and technology obstructs us from God - note that Mother Mary appeared to those living in very small, isolated areas - tragedy that Padre Pio as a child would have been thrown in a psychiatric institution - the crimes of Science that AXIOMATICALLY rejects the paranormal - I just cannot give the system what it wants - and many a time did they try to institutionalize me. You can just feel the Devil in that. No, I will continue this love and this work for the Fatherland

Update: need to bathe first and pray, then continue to deny myself food. I have not eaten today. I need to continue to mortify myself

Update II: oh wow, this is way weirder than anything you could ever imagine. I need to make a system. Now, this is FAITH. This is the LEAP OF FAITH. It's speaking to me. This is SO WEIRD that it has to be true. I have not proven it yet... I need way more samples. But this is WEIRD. It just has to be true. I'm going to prove it

Update III: inverted an imaginary indicative. Need to fill in the loose ends. This is WEIRD. The Truth of God will be clear if this holds. This is that WEIRD

Update IV: This holds!!!!