Catholic Jihadist for Fatherland: a translator's saga

Need to shorthand this Yesterday, met a black lady during my smoking prayer as I dare Death. She asked for directions via bus. Had no idea. We talked. I got her a Lyft luxury. In that talk, we shared our experiences of sexual abuse. She had relations with women. Then tried two guys. Both abused her. I advised that she always treat any guy who watches pornography as a red flag. I'm praying for her not to be homeless forever. It has been a month. The harms that people do to others... This is the Passion of Christ that we must ourselves carry on this Earth Before that, I was meditating hard on Saint Padre Pio. Got a solution to the hardest Article Zero problem in the book. It's the post-intro case. I have a strong conjecture that cannot be proven until I'm done logging and examining over 100,000 words. I have examined at least 1,800 unique words. No idea how many that would add to. Anyway, thank the Heavens. That conjecture developed a bit too easy for a problem that took me 8...

 Woke up this morning at 3:45 AM to find a strange email. Got offered a translation job by a HUGE French historian of monarchism. Nothing set in stone yet as he asked me to do Italian. I don't know any Italian. I'm totally of peasant stock and never took a single class of French but one high school course of sorts in college that I skipped a lot anyway. Think my translations are starting to baffle people. IT CAME FROM THE HEAVENS!!  I went to look for someone whom I encountered a few weeks ago. Hope to see him again. Hope that poor soul is ok. I can see so much color in his soul. I would like to give him $100 and food. I might have went there really early. I avoid going outside (actually not just at night) unless it is to study. Just a lot of sexual harassment. My cross probably keeps people away from me. It's a 19th-Century relic that gives me a lot of powers. It fits right in my palm. I superimpose it often over Joan of Arc.  I'm at peace about my stigmata. It was Aug...

 UPDATE: It was on 22 August when I wept for the first time. It makes sense as to why the stigmata formed over those 3 days. My husband had to go across town to deal with his Jeep. I didn't answer ANY of his texts. That was also the day when I took a picture of the scar in concrete from the porno page that I burnt on 9 August. I realized the issue when I saw the time stamp of the picture. I burnt the porn close to 4 PM. The picture of the concrete scar was taken a bit after 11:30 AM. YES, that was the visual that I saw!!!! That's when it formed Here's what's crazier. I tried to get back into ecstacy the next day. Husband kept texting me issues from the dealership. He had to return across town after they lied on Monday that the Jeep was ready. I lost focus. I vividly remember that it was about 12:50. I was at around Cloud 8. Not quite at Cloud 9. Then the worldly distractions pushed me back to Planet Earth. I was really distraught that day. Geez was I so sad I dealt with...

 So I saw the Italian film of Padre Pio last night. Wept about 8 times. Maybe 10. Maybe 6. I'm not very emotional. Maybe hysterical but not emotional. It was quite the film. It reminded me eerily of a lot that I went through to do my translation. It has been 8 years. I lost count a long time ago.  After I finished the film at 6 AM, I left to do my dental routine. I have not had an inkling of blood in years, even when flossing. Only blood appeared from when I had 3 extractions, the last of such which was without anesthesia. It was what I requested since we had maxed out on pain numbers. I took no antibiotics either. It was a fun experience. In any case, I spat blood last night after watching the movie. It was eerie but I do welcome death so long as I finish my project first since no one else in the world can do it. I did try to locate the blood. It was on the back of my molar. It was on my left side. (When I speak left and right, I mean from my point of view looking out. I get ...

I can't really get with the skeptical view from Catholic or non-believer alike. I had a trippy stigmata of sorts in August that lasted for 3 days. I can't explain it. It spooked me that much. It was not on my hand but on my wrist where I plan to be branded with a cross when my project gets completed. It built up on my wrist for days as a straight line. It had no burning in the contour sense. It was itchy, gray, and on what I didn't then would be my last day with this, I found porn in front of a coffee shop where I study. I burnt it in public. I guess it made me very sad when watching the Padre Pio film from 2000. I don't think my stigmata will ever come back. It was a bizarre religious experience. It's a secret that only I and God know about, with exception to my husband, who looked at it on the third day when I told him about it. I would have been very frightened but I've been there and done that for years in the sense of how frightened I would get during my tr...

 Just saw something tonight. A movie. Greatest movie ever It rekindled some feelings and memories. I brush off all critics. Family did attack me for doing this project. Church guy (not Catholic) had me thrown in a mental institution. I was persecuted... just took it. Kept working. Cop tore off my French cross from my neck just as something was taken from Padre Pio. I now know why I've been so fortunate for the aid of the Heavens. Even in secular form, I never lost faith or hope or love for a Higher purpose.  Everyone said that what I'm doing is impossible and a waste of time. And I'm so close to the finish line. Now I know why God loves me despite being somewhat of a brute prone to vulgarity and wrath. On the day that I got out of the mental institution, I went to the bar. Met an angel. First one I ever met with religious studies. PhD in physics. He told me that night that the church authorities felt threatened by my insights. Sounds feel-good, right? That was 7 years ago. ...

 That's all. Time to sleep. 6 hours of work. Back to help from the Heavens state

Late in June = fin juin En fin d'après-midi = in the afternoon lateness Early in Juin = début juin En début d'après-midi = in the afternoon earliness Not sure how that happened. Maybe my humor entertains the Heavens and I didn't do anything diabolical. It's tempting because Suffering is critical to the soul. Sometimes you are TEMPTED to seek a pact with the Devil to finish the project faster. But you can't do that. You'll get the answers. Just suffer, mortify, pray, think, believe, give yourself the Sign of the Cross of the cross Not sure how I'd bump into this song during my seance on Friday. Maybe Joan of Arc to whom I prayed with my 19th-Century relic cross? It has given me 24 hours of meditation  https://youtu.be/6MLii-J_YjQ

 I didn't!!! But it was a thought. Have an exercise after a few days of cooking. Trying to formalize inversions. I need magic powers but I'm really removed from God after a few days of cooking and just kind of not really doing a whole lot. Need to go through 1,200+ hyphenated cases to sift through the dirt. Look at the questions and exclamations too. So a few more hundred cases. Need to make a system for a great degree of variance that exists within this class. Going to make coffee and settle down. Energies are way over the top. Probably going to ask my husband to start a new blog. 

I never thought about this because it feels rooted in vanity but I would like to write a memoire of my life as a testimony to God's power. Bumped into something the other day. I couldn't find any picture of my right wrist stigmata. I think my husband took one but I haven't asked him. He's working. I did, however, text a kid whom I used to tutor about it, who is now a professor of logic. Best, I described the burn as having lasted 2 days so far. Even better, I found a picture from the day after of the marking in concrete from a crumpled page of pornography that I found towards the end of my work day. I told that kid too in that same text that the day prior, I wept over Saint Joan's execution. What I didn't write were the visions I had. Anyway, my husband asked a week later what happened to my wrist. I told him that it went away that night. It was a soothing burn of a straight line. He saw it himself and said "It does look pretty gray." That line told me...

 Spiritual energy needs recharging. Guess I'm going to cook for two days straight, then get back to work on Friday. Might work on [ce]f and [c']f but that's about it. Need to prove those

 Yup. Tired and venturing forth is risky. Don't need a ship wreck. I've navigated the seas quite well so far without disaster after several years of failed expeditions. Need to meditate about how to organize the vast [être]f cases. I could get 5,000 words logged and sorted in my glossary. Getting more insights about how to deal with prepositional complements without intersection. I'll be ready for the Kingdom of Heaven one day

Today was weird. Husband asked me a question about French grammar. I then lectured for 3 hours without any notes. Blew his mind when I discussed a lot of basic things that are just needed to read two sentences. Only thing is I get irate at times when I'm asked questions that feel repetitive  Proved after 8 years [y avoir]f. I overlooked something so obvious. It's a spanning set so the standard translation is fine Going to move to [Ce]f and [C']f. That's where the pressure is. No intersection allowed. Project might be almost done. Geez My seance did work up to a point. It was deep but somewhat forced from my low reserves of energy. Got what I needed but not where I expected and what was hoped for led me to the right path. Almost done, God willing Need to shower, meditate, move into a psychic mode, then work until 5 AM

Battle between Ce, impersonals, and il. It's about 3 AM. Been working for 15 hours with exception to some holiday shopping. Had less than a thousand calories. Intense seance earlier. Got me close. I was dancing with the Cross. Not quite there. I might need to do some surgery. Trying to avoid that. Might need to log all of the cases and stare at them for a few days. Need to sleep. Need a spiritual spike. I will solve this. It must be solved

Thought I wouldn't have to do sorcery soon. It's exhausting. I've gotten injured from exhaustion. But God calls you sometimes. I need a miracle. This might take a few days. A lot of things can go wrong. I'm not sure a solution is possible. That's why a miracle is needed. Sorry in advance if I can't do it.  There's a reason why. I need to use [Il]f for weather and possibly extend that to a few cases. Sad since I'm so exhausted. So was Christ after raising Lazarus. Solving this requires far less energy than it takes to raise one from the Dead. That's why He's Christ and I'm not. 

 I can't give this away. One academic for sure stole my work. I suspect a few other academics have done so too for something not that consequential, unlike what's true in the first case. It's also a career of strivers. Not my kind of people. I only like nice people generally So this is in code but this is what I'm doing: You got two languages. They're like doughs. I can't move one of them. But the other? I'll... hmm... freeze parts, inject other parts, do a bit of surgery here and there, find entire cell structures that make up a class, do a few transplants here and there, maybe do a bit of makeup, never subtracting except for a few things that need to be plucked, like excessive eyebrow hair, then find parts within the dough that can be combined to make something new (like cooking!), and use a third, fourth, and fifth dough that serve for substitutes when this second dough proves inadequate  And what you got? The two doughs are one in the same but in how the...

 Yes, looked through my Glossary. No seance is needed. It's always important to expand your sets into your framework. And sometimes you peer into the abyss that takes you too far. [Suicide]f is not an apposition. We got to remember some fundamental facts about life: This is what it is This is what you think it is This is the nature of it This is the feature that amplifies the nature of it This is after whom or what it is named _ 5 cases. Bam. All in codes until the project is to be revealed

 Yes! No, not fun. I'll have to rock around for many hours, hold my cross, listen to Conan the Destroyer music to solve some very subtle issues.  - we got [militaire]f and [politique]f. Cool. Let's make a class? - we got several adjectivial constructs done. I mean, there are a ton! Homerics, normal adjectives, postpostives (two cases), appositions. There's one class of appositions that I have not brought myself to solve. I could link that to the above. But there are also substantives that look like appositions - last sentence is critical. That's where I'll have to direct my sorcery skills, which I've done not that much but I've done them. They're seances. No sense of self exists. It's existing in a total state of Humility. Things stop to feel real. I'm usually like this but this is super amplified. There should be a hidden class within appositions that distinguish from just a basic adjective My project is secret. That's why I'm not talkin...

 I don't think Padre Pio would like me because I sometimes don't cover everything above the kneecap. That said, it doesn't really matter what he would think of me. He's still holy, did miracles, and has the right to his opinion. I prayed for him during my 2 October Exorcism. Was he part of it? I can't really remember a lot of the first part of the exorcism. It was so trippy. I vaguely remember his presence possibly being there. I am healed of my sleeping disorder. Was it him or was it Christ? Was it both? There were more involved for sure. What he would know is that no matter where I was in life and no matter my belief system at the time, Padre Pio's story as told on Unsolved Mysteries was never far from me. It's people like him who can make most of the skeptics or the misguided or the apathetic believe. I guess he might have remembered that about me despite my flaws Thank you very much, Padre Pio. May you continue to enjoy your eternal life in Heaven Today ...

 Ok, the Exorcism has been discussed. Moving forward with Alms. Do them! I love doing alms. Make food for others like service workers, donate to the church, do great deeds, give to the poor as Saint Martin of Tours did. Did you know that Saint Joan of Arc was proven Holy in part because EVERYONE said that she did alms? Nope, she was not possessed by demons! Here's a great one. I go to the 7-Eleven to get a carton of cigarettes. Yes, like I said elsewhere, I do smoke. Know how it started? That pedophile was doing horrible stuff and I found horrible stuff inside his home. I didn't have much power to do much to him. Who was going to believe me anyway? I just felt this hugely evil air in his home. I wanted to murder him. I went nuts one night in silence at a friend's house when I got stoned. My mind was racing a million miles an hour. My head was buried in the couch.  I planned on killing him! Use a needle with bleach. Put it under his couch. Then when he sits on it, the bleach...

 Hi!!!! So I'm about to go to sleep very soon. There's a huge story there. I have (or had) Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder. It's BRUTAL!! I guess the way to explain this is that just about everyone has a normal clock. You make up in the morning. DSPD is the total inverse. What's normal is to be alert at night, then sleep at about 6 AM. I've struggled with this since I was 17. I don't know what caused it, but it did start with a pedophile molesting me. It would be about 3 AM. Who knows. I'd walk for miles. Wasn't sure why or what was my intention. It was aimless almost. This disorder never left me. What's worse is that it obstructs my productivity. I only like to work in the morning when I can get my special table at the coffee shop (my monastery). I'll get disturbed if I don't have access to the table for long.  It was October 2nd. For a few days before, I was texting my therapist that my husband made me see. I was telling her that I'm screw...

 Feeling super manic, as though I want to turn the sword on myself. It's an exhilarating feeling to die. Have done mortification today for over 24 hours. That's an almost daily thing. I no longer get that drop in blood pressure. Ate a heavy split pea soup tonight. Working on the penultimate phase of the project where I'm to log over 100,000 words prior to doing the last phase of the project (besides proving it) That translation was something profound. I saw the title of the book. It was so audacious, masculine, and sexy. I felt called by God to do it. It was all a leap of faith.  I'll discuss the many miracles that have transpired. It often brings me to tears during my work. I think about Saint Joan of Arc. I laid my 19th-Century cross on her picture. She sacrificed herself to manifest God's will in history.  I need to get back to work. When I'm done with this project, I'm going to have myself be branded with the Cross of Lorraine on my right wrist. I told a...